The Mad Cake Batter

sweet treats and savory deets


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Vegan Cheesecake Bites

My sister has just recently joined the ranks of the lactose-intolerant, and I have been trying to find something that will not upset her stomach. This was posted on Well & Good just days before she arrived for a long weekend of hanging. The recipe originally calls for kiwi instead of peach but after discussing it with my roommate, we decided peach would be a good idea because it is in season.

We also did not follow the instructions for soaking the cashews. My roommate also makes her own cashew milk from time to time and she reassured me that just soaking the cashews for an extended period of time is fine (and she usually soaks them overnight).  The cashews soaked for about 8 hours and were super soft and ready to go. Just drain and you are ready to go.


  • 2/3 cup raw almonds
  • 12 medjool dates, pitted and chopped
  • 1/2 cup and 1 Tbsp melted virgin coconut oil, divided
  • 2 cups raw cashews
  • 1/3 cup agave
  • 1/3 cup lemon juice
  • 1 tsp vanilla
  • Pinch of sea salt
  • 2 Tbsp fresh ginger, finely-grated
  • 1/2 cup fresh spinach (but could use kale)
  • 2-3 peaches


Line a 8×8 inch baking dish with parchment paper with overhang. Set aside.

In a food processor, throw in almonds, dates, and one tablespoon of melted coconut oil blend on high. Once the mixture is finely ground, transfer it to the baking dish and press it down firmly with your hands and the back of a spoon.

Combine the remaining half cup of melted coconut oil, drained cashews, agave, lemon juice, vanilla extract, and sea salt in the food processor on high until smooth and creamy. Pour half of the mixture on the crust and put the baking dish in the freezer.

With the remaining filling in the blender, add the ginger, greens and peaches cut into forths. Blend on high until smooth and creamy. Remove the baking dish from the freezer and evenly pour this green filling on top of the other layer. Smooth it over with the back of a spoon, then transfer the dish back into the freezer to chill until completely firm.


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Bluberry Galette

This recipe from Bon Appetit  was super easy and quick if you want something that kind of resembles a pie but doesn’t take all the time. You

^ FAIL ^

^ FAIL ^

can make the whole galette in one day, but you can also make the crust a day or two before. I had some issues with toasting the pecans as you well shortly see, but luckily had enough to try again!

The original recipe toasts the pecans in the oven where I used the stove. It only takes a few minutes so once they become fragrant, remove them from the heat.


  • ½ cup pecans
  • 1 cup plus 2 TBS all-purpose flour
  • 2 tsp sugar
  • ½ tsp salt
  • ¼ tsp cinnamon
  • 1 stick chilled unsalted butter, cut into pieces
  • 12 ounces blueberries 
  • 1 TBS arrowroot
  •  tsp fresh lemon juice
  • ¼ cup sugar
  • 2 TBS milk
  • Demarara sugar for sprinkling

galette2In a skillet over medium heat, toast pecans until fragrant. Remove from heat and allow to cool. Pulse pecans in a food processor until they are coarsely chopped. Add flour, sugar, salt, and cinnamon and pulse just to combine. Add butter and pulse until the mixture is crumbly. In a large bowl; drizzle 4 Tbsp. ice water and mix until it is just combined. Create a 6″-diameter disk with the dough, wrap in plastic, and chill at least 1 hour (or overnight).

Preheat oven to 375°. Toss blueberries, arrowroot, lemon juice, and ¼ cup sugar in a large bowl. On a lightly floured surface, roll the dough to a 12″ round. Transfer to a parchment-lined baking sheet. Place blueberry mixture in center of dough, leaving a 2″ border. Fold edges over, overlapping slightly. Brush dough with milk and sprinkle with sugar. Bake for about 45–50 minutes. The crust should be a dark golden brown and filling, bubbling Let cool before serving. It also be covered in plastic for the following day.



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Strawberry Shortcakes

This is from a recipe from Thug Kitchen. If you don’t know Thug Kitchen, you need to get on that shit ASAP. Though I had an epic fail with the coconut cream, (lesson: get the full fat coconut milk unless told otherwise) the shortcakes turned out pretty good. I made them for a Fourth of July party last week and it just so happens to be one of the hostess’s favorite dessert. This recipe will make about 8 shortcakes.scakes


  • 1 pound strawberries
  • 2 TBS sugar

Chop the strawberries into small pieces and throw them in a bowl. They say you could add 2 to 4 TBS sugar, I only used about 2 TBS and it was sufficient. Set aside.


  • 1 1/4 cup whole wheat flour
  • 1 cup white flour
  • 1 TBS baking powder
  • 2 TBS sugar
  • 1/2 tsp salt
  • 1 cup canned coconut milk
  • 1/2 tsp vanilla extract

Preheat oven to 425F and prepare a baking sheet with parchment paper. In a bowl, combine the flours, baking powder, sugar and salt. Make a crater and add the coconut milk and extract. Stir until well-combined. On a floured surface, and pat the dough into a rectangle that’s about 1 1/2 inch scakes1thick. Don’t overwork the dough. Using a cookie cutter or a rim of a glass, cut out the biscuits and place them on the cookie sheet. Bake for about 12-15 minutes. The bottoms of the biscuits should be browned and allow to cool.


  • 1 can coconut milk, well chilled
  • 2 TBS powdered sugar
  • 1/2 tsp vanilla extract (optional)

Place the beaters and bowl in the freezer for about 15 minutes. Once the time is up, grab the bowl, beaters, and coconut milk and scoop out the white “fat” part of the milk. Do not use the clear part of the milk. Add the powdered sugar and beat on medium-high for 1 to 2 minutes.

*Since I bought the Lite Coconut Milk the whip topping did not whip. We were also having issues with the fridge so the milk may not have been cold enough.. Either way the cards were not in my favor and I was left with a liquid mixture of coconut milk and powdered sugar. So what is a girl to do? I improvised and made a make shift buttercream. I added about half a stick of butter and a shit-ton of powdered sugar. I think I accidentally stumbled onto something bc the buttercream was very creamy so I may need to try coconut milk out for my next buttercream.

To assemble the cakes: cut the biscuits in half. Layer the strawberry filling on the bottom half, add a scoop of whipped cream, top with the other biscuit layer and top it off with more strawbs and cream. ENJOY!


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Strawberry Rhubarb Buckle

So Martha has this recipe for a rhubarb pie. While it may have been delicious, whenever I think about rhubarb, I think about it as a bitter, red celery. Last year, I made a strawberry rhubarb pie, and I thought I would change up Martha’s recipe and do something along those lines. Instead of 1 lb and 10 oz of rhubarb, I did 1 lb strawberries and 10 oz of rhubarb.

I also didn’t check to see if I had all the ingredients and naturally, I didn’t have sour cream hanging out in my refrigerator. I put in almond milk instead. Though the buckle may have lost the creamy texture from the sour cream, it still tasted pretty good with the almond milk. This was an extremely easy recipe and if you prefer to follow the original you can find Martha’s version here: original.


  • buckle2coconut oil for greasing the cake pan
  • 10 oz rhubarb
  • 1 lb strawberries
  • 2 cups sugar, divide
  • 2 cups all-purpose flour
  • 1 1/4 tsp baking powder
  • 1 tsp salt
  • 1 1/2 stick butter, room temp
  • 3 large eggs
  • 1 tsp vanilla extract
  • 1/2 almond flour


  • 1 cup all-purpose flour
  • 1/4 cup light brown sugar
  • 1/4 tsp salt
  • 1/2 stick butter, melted

buckle1Preheat the oven 350F, and prepare a 9-inch square pan (Martha uses two 9 inch pans but I was fine with one), line with parchment and have the paper hang over the rim of the pan. Trim and cut the rhubarb into half-inch pieces and slice the strawberries. Stir in the rhubarb, strawberries and 1 cup sugar in a bowl and set aside.

In a separate bowl, whisk flour, baking powder, and salt. In a stand mixer, cream the butter, remaining cup sugar, and the lemon zest until light and fluffy. Add the eggs, 1 at a time, then beat in vanilla. Add half of the flour mixture, and alternating with the almond milk, beginning and ending with the dry mixture.

For the crumb topping: Stir together flour, brown sugar, and salt. Add melted butter and stir to combine. In the prepared pan add the batter and top with fruit mixture (you may want to remove some of the excess juice created while the fruit masticated), and sprinkle with crumb topping. Bake until golden on top and cooked through (about 1 hour).

Allow the buckle to cool completely, then lift cakes from the pan using the parchment. Cut buckle into 2-inch squares and top with ice cream.


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Birthday Layer Cake

The final cake in the trio was the Milkbar’s Birthay Layer Cake because it’s not a birthday without birthday cake. This is probably the most famous cake from the Milkbar, and almost anyone loves a good confetti cake. If Milkbar would have a mascot, I think this would be it. I have make the birthday cookie numerous times, but it finally time to make the cake.


  • 1/2 cup granulated sugar
  • 1 1/2 TBS light brown sugar
  • 3/4 cup cake flour
  • 1/2 tsp baking powder
  • 1/2 tsp kosher salt
  • 2 TBS rainbow sprinkles
  • 1/4 cup grapeseed oil
  • 1 TBS vanilla extract

They suggest using a clear vanilla extract. I use the regular and don’t see much of a difference. Preheat oven to 300F. In a stand mixer with the paddle attachment, combine all the dry ingredients on low. Add the oil and vanilla to the mixture and mix until well incorporated. Evenly spread out the clusters on a silpat-lined baking sheet. Bake for about 20 minutes, checking on the crumbs occasionally and breaking them up. Be careful not to overcook the crumbs. Take them out if they start to brown and allow to cool.



  • 4 TBS butter, room temp
  • 1/3 cup coconut oil
  • 1 1/4 cup granulated sugar
  • 3 TBS light brown sugar
  • 3 eggs
  • 1/2 cup buttermilk
  • 1/3 cup grapeseed oil
  • 2 tsp vanilla extract
  • 2 cups cake flour
  • 1 1/2 tsp baking powder
  • 3/4 tsp kosher salt
  • 1/4 cup + 2 TBS rainbow sprinkles

Again, they use vegetable shortening where I prefer to use coconut oil. To each’s own. Preheat oven to 300F and have 3 6-inch cake rounds prepared with either pam spray or coconut oil and lined the bottom with parchment paper. In a stand mixer with a paddle attachment, cream the butter, coconut oil, and sugars on medium-high for 2-3 minutes. Scrape down the sides of the bowl with a spatula and add the eggs. Increase speed back up to medium-high for another 2-3 minutes. Scrape down the sides of the bowl.

On low speed, add the buttermilk, grapeseed oil, and vanilla. Increase speed to medium-high for 4-6 minutes. Mixture should be doubled and consistent. There should be no streaks in the mixture and scrape down the sides of the bowl to make sure all ingredients are incorporated.

Add the flour, baking powder, salt, and 1/4 cup of the sprinkles. Mix on low speed for about a minute. Evenly distribute the batter between the 3 cake rounds and evenly sprinkle the remaining 2 TBS of sprinkles on the cakes. Bake for 30-35 minutes. The cake will double in size and dome in the center. Test the cake with a knife and take the cakes out if it comes out clean. Cool the cakes on a wire rack.


  • 1/4 cup milk
  • 1 tsp vanilla extract

In a small bowl or pyrex, whisk the ingredients together.



  • 8 TBS butter, room temp
  • 1/4 cup coconut oil
  • 2 oz cream cheese
  • 1 TBS glucose
  • 1 TBS corn syrup
  • 1 TBS vanilla extract
  • 2-4 cups confectionary sugar
  • 1/2 tsp kosher salt
  • pinch baking powder
  • pinch of citric acid

I always seem to use more confectionary sugar than they suggest (1 1/4 cup) . In the stand mixer, cream the butter, coconut oil, and cream cheese on medium-high for 2-3 minutes. Scrape down the sides of the bowl.

On the lowest speed, add the glucose, corn syrup and vanilla. Increase the speed to medium-high for another 2-3 minutes until the mixture is smooth. Scrape down the sides of the bowl. Add the confectionary sugar (one cup at a time), baking powder and citric acid. Mix on low to for about a minute and then increase the speed to medium-high for 2-3 minutes.



On a cardboard round, add the first cake layer in the center. With a serrated knife, level the cake and use 1 sheet of acetate to line around the cake. Give the cake a healthy layer or the cake soak and spread one-fifth of the cake frosting on the cake. Sprinkle about a third of the crumb on the frosting and anchor the crumbs using the back of your hand. Then add another layer of frosting.

Before adding the second layer of cake, using the knife again, level the cake. Then gently, add the layer to the cake. At this point, the cake should have met the top of the acetate so add a second layer around the cake. Follow the same pattern for the second layer.

For the final layer of cake, level the layer using the knife before adding it to the cake. Cover the top with the remaining frosting and garnish with the crumb. Cover the top using plastic wrap and transfer the cake to the freezer for a minimum of 12 hours to set the cake.

Remove the cake from the freezer at least 3 hours before serving. Remove the plastic wrap and acetate and let it defrost in the fridge.